This can be cliché, but we are often our own worst enemies. The lies that are firmly rooted in our brains tend to strangle out the roots of the new ideas we try to plant. I’ve had a week of “weeding” out some of those problems.
It all started with a conversation with a friend – who herself has a weight struggle – and has been one of my most steadfast supporters on this journey.
Friend: I realized – while I am ready for change and have been for quite a while my hindrance is that I don’t believe I can succeed. So even though I have all the tools I need to be successful I don’t do those things because I don’t believe it will work for me. Funny – we’re talking about faith in church and one of the things that the Pastor keeps saying is that you won’t get the results you want if you’re believing wrong about something. For example – you’re not likely to receive healing if you don’t believe it’s God’s will to heal you even if you’d like to be healed. It works the same for the weight loss I think – even though I want to lose weight I don’t believe I can and so I don’t take the steps I know I should (and can) because I don’t believe it will make any difference. So, guess I need to work on my “believer.”
Me: I know EXACTLY what you mean there. DH asked me not long ago, “Could you have lost the weight without the surgery?” I said, “No, because I didn’t think I had it in me.” The tool was my crutch – but also my rope from the bottom of the canyon. No, I shouldn’t have NEEDED the surgery – but it was what made me finally think I could be successful. I did still have to climb out, though. I do understand your mindset here.
Friend: Interesting choice of terms – Pastor just said last week – God doesn’t mind if you use a crutch while you’re getting your mindset correctly. Sometimes crutches are what it takes to get us from unbelieving to believing, from doubt to faith.
We’ve probably talked about this before (when it was you rather than me…) but did you know that the “problem” was that you didn’t believe you could be successful and what did you do to deal with that, surgery aside. I’m trying to stop running myself down for failed past attempts and all that and put into practice the things I know are true and will work but what I’ve found in my brain is that I’m looking for that one “thing” that will ensure my success because I’m so tired of failing.
Me: No, I didn’t know that that was the problem. My mindset was always “If I could just get over the hump – pain wise – I could do this.” Which, in my case, proved to be very true. My pain isn’t all gone, but the helping hand of surgery did help me get over several humps – past weights which I previously couldn’t hurdle, past the bulk of my plantar fasciitis, etc. But, I’m also of the mindset that “I don’t want to be another statistic.” I see too many people have this surgery and end up gaining it back.
I was very clear in my purpose – this was so I could LIVE MY FIT DREAMS. (That’s not just my blog tag line – but truly my intention.) In fact, I talked to my acupuncture gal today about that – my “new” fear – what if I can’t accomplish these dreams because of injury, etc. She reminded me that I’m so enjoying the JOURNEY that it really shouldn’t be an issue. I might have to change the sport of choice – but that opens new adventures, too.